random issues
by voxdemorte
Summary: sometimes things don't happen quite like we plan in bed


Sephiroth's lithe, strong form poured over Cloud's body ...his toungue doing things that were just...just amazing! All Cloud could do was lie there and moan hoarsely. He had tried to tell Sephiroth 'no' again tonight, but it had only taken a few touches with his fingertips before Cloud melted into a puddle. Suddenly Cloud felt a mouth close around his nipple, and his whole body bucked as a whimper left his lips loud enough to wake the dead. Seph moved with him. As always there was no escape, no time to collect his thoughts...Then suddenly the sheets rumbled and billowed around the lovers and Seph cringed. He could feel the warmth creeping up his legs, above the sheets and suddenly Cloud wailed. Leaping from where just moments ago he lay in heaven, he fanned his nose and looked at Seph with a horrified expression. Eyes watering and nose running, his hair seemed somehow spikier, impossible as that seemed. He shot Seph a cold glare as he dissapeared into the bathroom. Seph stretched across the covers, truely a magnificent sight to behold, if not for the biohazardous properties of the room at the moment. Cloud poured body wash into the drain, opened the window and hunkered down while he waited for the air to become breathable again. How dare he profane their lovemaking with his befouling the air like that! Twenty minutes later Cloud was still sulking as he was wont to do, and Sephs erection was nil and to make matters worse, he was hungry. Throwing his robe around his body and tying it firmly he stomped out of the room, his beautiful eyes glaring daggers about the halls. One unlucky third class soldier was booted out a window for failing to get out of his path quickly enough. Stalking down to the full cafeteria, everyone stared warily at the black robed general. Whispers filled the mess hall about his lack of appropriate dress. He cut in front of about a dozen mixed third and seconds in line...the one that dared protest rapidly finding a perfect imprint of his face in the metal tray...as the officers table snickered into the backs of their hands. He reached for some chocolate pudding and cheese pizza, his ultimate comfort foods, (Things which, gentle reader, Hojo never taught him the hazards of mixing. Cheese and over processed cocoa. Yup, I just broke that fourth wall into pieces!) and he nibbled at the cheese, stretching it with his mouth, his eyes downcast. Heidegger came down for his afternoon tea and noticed his star general...In his bathrobe!...eating junk food in front of the ranks. His face reddened with irriatation...What was the meaning of this? Dismissing all the soldiers at mess to report to duty immediately, Heidegger stomped over to Seph, angry enough to spit and barked "TEN CHUN!" loudly. Sephiroth looked the director over calmly, picked the last bit of cheese from his snack and languidly rose, he robe stretching to nearly not there against his broad chest. Heidegger could not help but stammer for a moment, losing his train of thought. When his mind began to function again...or as much as it ever functioned...he resumed delivering the dressing down about setting an example for the recuits and the rank and file. Seph calmly tuned him out and nodded at the correct places in the speech. His expression never changed. Then, suddenly his gut rumbled weakly. "May I be excused? I have paperwork I must attend to." Heidegger's face reddened further and he near bellowed "No you arrogant cuss, you may not! I believe you need to engage in basic excercises to remind you of your place...twenty sqats immediately, or I shall consider demoting you!" he barked, carrying all the authority and ferocity the director of shinra's SOLDIER program must. Seph groaned, and began the exercises, clenching his buttocks most tightly. 16, 17, almost there! 18,19, then it happened again...the rumble...falling back against the floor in hopes of stopping everything with pressure, the very tile vibrated! Seph's everlong hair fluttered back down around him as the director simply fainted. He heard a rush of feet and windows opening....Cloud apparently had forgiven him. "You made our idiot director pass out! That, my dear, is enough to forgive anything!" and Cloud leaned down to help Seph to his feet. He gently lead him outside, far away from the compound for several hours...Saving the whole of Shinra in the process. The meadow they lingered in wound up with scorch marks by the end of the day. Cloud simply made a point of conversing with Seph...staying upwind...for those hours. Then they retired to bed once his...issue...had exausted its seemingly endless supply.


End file.
